My Birth Story

From the moment I saw the "Pregnant" on my pregnancy test back in September, I've been imagining what childbirth would be like. There are a million stories out there, and everyone wants to tell you theirs... all about how they spent 3 hours in labor and it only took 2 pushes to get the baby out with no pain, or how they spent 30 hours in labor and a gruesome hour pushing the baby out and somehow their epidural didn't work so they felt everything. You always hope you're one of the lucky ones who gets that baby out in 2 pushes. Well... unfortunately for me, I wasn't one of the lucky ones. Here is MY story.

...

It was Friday, April 30. I had a doctor's appointment and when I got there, my recorded blood pressure was at its highest. I'd already been on bed rest for a week because by BP kept going up (and I hated every moment of it. I am not one to sit around and do nothing... my mind races with things I could be getting done), and it still wasn't improving. My doctor sent me over to Labor and Delivery to be observed for a few hours. I was able to put on one of those fashionable hospital gowns and lay in the bed hooked up to the blood pressure machine and the heart rate monitor. They also did another ultrasound to make sure the baby was ok. They measured her and said she weighed 8 lbs 13 oz! After a minor freak out, I asked if there was any way they could be wrong. The nurse smiled and said there is a one pound margin of error, but it could go either way (up or down). After a couple of hours laying in the bed, my BP went down to normal and they sent me home with orders to come back on Saturday for a follow up.

I got up Saturday morning and made it back to the hospital around 9 am. They hooked me up to all the machines again and this time my blood pressure didn't go down. On top of that, I started developing Bells Palsy (one side of my face was numb and unresponsive... totally unflattering) which concerned the nurse even more. The nurse consulted with the doctor on call and it was decided that they would induce me, seeing as I was 38 weeks pregnant, my baby was big and my blood pressure was spiking. Meanwhile, my whole family was on vacation in California and because of me, they had to cut their vacation short. Already, my imagined delivery was shattered... nothing was going the way I wanted it! I always pictured myself sitting at work when the contractions started, and rushing over to Sean to tell him "it's time!" and going to the hospital excited and ready. Oh well.

At 11 am, I was moved from the "observation room" to an actual "labor and delivery room" and the doctor inserted the first Cytotec to ripen my cervix and get things moving, with a warning that I had a 50% chance of delivering normally and a promise that I would still be pregnant by morning. He kept saying I have an "unfavorable cervix"... how's that for dashing your hopes? My family made it home by 8 pm and sure enough, I was still pregnant. By then, I had already had another Cytotec inserted but the ripening process was slow. A little after midnight, and on my third Cytotec, my contractions were finally close enough together to begin the Pitocin. I went another eight hours with just Pitocin until the doctor came and broke my water. And boy did that change everything! Up until that point I was thinking, "hmmm contractions really aren't that bad"... Yeah RIGHT. I pushed myself until early afternoon when I finally told the nurse ENOUGH I want an epidural! I thought it would be hell getting that shot but it really wasn't bad at all. The anesthesiologist was impressed that I didn't even flinch :) but I was ready for the pain to end and compared to contractions, the shot was nothing. Life was bliss after that... or as close to bliss as you could get lying in a hospital bed in labor.

Things really started progressing after the epidural and by Sunday evening I was dilated to an 8. I thought for sure I would have her by the end of the night... but I was wrong. Midnight came and went and I was still only dilated to an 8. I finally made it to a 9 in the wee hours of morning, but there I stayed. The nurse came in around 5 am and said "I just talked to the doctor and he says that we need to start looking at c-section. Your labor has stalled." I lost it. My first thought was "are you kidding me? I've been here for almost 2 days and NOW after ALL THAT I have to get a c-section?" I was deflated and I felt a bit pathetic. Why couldn't my body do it? I'm a person who likes to push through anything, so why wasn't my body cooperating? Generations of women have had normal deliveries, why couldn't I? Sean climbed in bed with me and held me while I wept like a child. I didn't want a c-section!! I just didn't! The nurse came back in and tried to comfort me, telling me that I didn't have to do anything I didn't want to and if it meant that much to me to have a normal delivery, I could express that to the doctor and they could try everything in the book to get my body ready.

The doctor-on-call came in around 8 am with his recommendation that we do a c-section. I explained to him how I felt and he said "Yes I understand. It's like you've ran a marathon but didn't get to finish." BINGO. That's exactly what it was like. It's a very disappointing feeling. He checked me again and declared I was still a 9, and then he discovered that my baby was "sunny side up" which didn't help my chances of delivering vaginally. He gave me my choices and Sean and I decided that we would give it one last shot. They increased the Pitocin to 60, came in every hour to turn me side to side hoping that it would encourage the baby to turn on her own and gave me a time limit of 2 hours. I prayed with all my heart that everything would work out for me and that I would be able to push this baby out the way I wanted to. But as everyone knows, prayers aren't always answered the way we want them to be. At 10, my doctor came in and checked me again. She said "I think it's time." She was worried about me getting a uterine infection since my water had been broken for over 24 hours. I agreed, if somewhat reluctantly.

By 10:30 they were wheeling me to the operating room. It only took a few minutes to prep me. I already had the epidural in, so the anesthesiologist just increased the dosage until my legs were completely numb and feeling as large as tree trunks. They put the sheet up to block my view and spread my arms wide. The doctor made the incision and then they called Sean in. At 11:09, our precious baby was brought into this world. Sean got to watch the miracle happen and when they pulled her out he said "It's a girl" and he turned and smiled at me.

I can't even describe the feelings that came over me when I heard her first cry. It was like nothing I've ever experienced before, and all I wanted to do was hold her. My arms ached for her. Unfortunately, when you have a c-section, your baby isn't given right to you. They laid her right next to my face for a few moments as they stitched me up, but then they whisked her away to the nursery with Sean in tow and I had to go to a separate recovery room for about 45 minutes. That was pure torture. As the epidural wore off, I began to shake uncontrollably and I hated being in that room alone. I wanted my husband and my baby.

Finally we were reunited and moved to a different room on the 4th floor (the Mom & Baby unit) and the family was able to join us. I got to hold her in my arms for the first time and I will never forget how good that felt. I love my precious baby!

...

Allison Jane Hilsmann

Born 5/3/10 at 11:09 am

8 lbs 8 oz

20 1/2 inches long